MEN ARE LIKE DOGS

I was reading about a phenomenon called the Peter Pan Syndrome.  – Amazing what humans write about.  Apparently this syndrome is when a male human refuses to grow up. I discussed the topic with Jet.  Jet is my foster mom. I was rescued from a kill shelter the day before they were going to euthanize me. I live with Jet for now and write this dog blog to enlighten humans.

But I digress.

When I mentioned the Peter Pan issue to Jet, she said, “Men are a lot like dogs.” Of course, I’m a dog and I think this is quite a compliment. However, Jet has a funny sense of humor so I thought I’d ask her to elaborate on her declaration.

When I met Jet, she worked 80 hours a week.  She was loving but so serious and intense.  She said that sometimes getting older makes humans more serious; tough times, losses, financial troubles often create the same results. Jet says that most men weather these sorts of things better because, like dogs, they never forget the kid inside, to have fun over the simplest things. They (men) still remain playful. They don’t refuse to grow up (like those Peter Pan guys); they forget to grow up. – Much like a dog.  

She’s right. Dogs are so easy. A game of fetch, we’re happy; a loving pat on the head, we’re ecstatic. Men are pretty simple too. Give them a cold beer, a game called football while sitting in a fat chair in front of a big TV and they have a stupid grin on their face the entire day.

Humans seem to remember their kid spirit a little more about this time of year. Holidays have such a strange effect on humans. This is very confusing to my dog buddies. Why do humans need a holiday to find their fun? Why wouldn’t they want this every day? 

So here’s my lesson for the week: Find your fun. Serve it up as a ‘gift’ for the holidays and then re-open every day.

LETTER FROM A FAN

Dear Parker:

My name is Gus. My humans and I live in Florida where it is warm all the time so I like walking at night when it is cooler.  Is there some way to make it safer for my human to walk me when it is dark?  It is hard to see both of us on the sidewalk.

Dear Gus:

I’m glad to hear you are considering safety measures when you walk at night. I agree that the cool evenings are great for getting out.  Tell your human to use a light up leash like the one in the attached photo.  By the way, these make great gifts for all your friends too.  Your pal, Parker.

THE THANKSGIVING SYNDROME

Humans have a disease I refer to as the Thanksgiving Syndrome. It is not a medical condition per se but instead an outcome of a cultural bug that seems to infect the fortunate.

Hi, I’m Parker: a dog, an intellect, a blogger and a champion of teaching humans the lessons needed to become and/or sustain their best self.  This brings me back to my topic of the week: the Thanksgiving Syndrome. Every November, family pets gather around the holiday table to listen to humans pray and share details about what they are thankful for in their lives.  They wax poetic about the most endearing things: their health, their loved ones, and the splendid spread of food on the table… They do this and yet most of the days before Thanksgiving and most of the days thereafter, humans fail to remember any of these precious gifts. They will, in fact, spend an egregious amount of energy complaining about the coffee they drink being inferior to their favorite flavor at Starbuck’s, fussing because of the long line they had to wait in to buy their next iPhone, the cramped seating on a luxury airliner taking them to beautiful vacation spots, the pounds they put on from eating too much fresh food, the inconvenience of losing electricity after a storm. This is the Thanksgiving Syndrome: remembering, only one day a year to be thankful for what really matters and spending the rest of the time grousing about what doesn’t.

The animals that gather around that same holiday table and sit among the human feet (me included) are thankful for what matters – every single day of the year. Let me demonstrate my point by sharing some stories recently contributed from my four-legged friends.

We are thankful for foster parents and adoptive parents who safely transport us to better places

and give us a pleasant place to watch over you. 

We are thankful for the volunteers who rescue us from disaster areas like Super Storm Sandy.

We are thankful for play time..,                        And a regular meal.

Blessed is our play time.

We are thankful for a regular, healthy meal for ourselves and for our puppies.

We are thankful for the cleaning, trimming and medical treatment we receive after being pulled out of puppy mills.

We are thankful for a bath and medical attention.

                                                                                         

We are thankful when terrible puppy mills are shut down.

    

                                 ... And we are forever grateful for the warm embrace of a loving human.

                          

So here’s my lesson for the week: Sit down with your family and write down the things that matter the most to you, i.e., the heart-enriching, meaningful things. Pick a symbol and/or a word that represents the items on your list and place it around your home, in your teen’s dorm room or locker door; on your office desk.  Every time you see the symbol or word, remind yourself of what genuinely matters. Start this tradition over the dinner table this Thanksgiving so that next year when you gather at the same table, you have a history of thankfulness for the most precious gifts (good health; safety, a clean home; a loving family), - things we four-legged devoted animals NEVER take for granted.

LETTER FROM A FAN

Dear Parker: Smells, even those that humans call stinky, are something I find downright fascinating. Of course I’m a dog and we all feel that way. Humans seem upset by certain scents, which brings me to my question. I’ve got a canine pal with a chronic gas problem. I should mention my pal is also the fastest eater on the block. – Farts have a fascinating fragrance - to me but upset my friend’s human family. Is there anything that can be done to reduce the gas problem?                                                                             Curious Cruz

Dear Cruz:

First, make sure your ‘pal’ sees a vet to make certain there is nothing wrong with him that requires medication or some type of medical procedure. What I’ve learned by listening to my foster mom and her wise friends is that dogs eating too fast can cause canine bloat (and farts). There are feeders available that by the nature of their design require a dog to search for his/her food that forces the dog to eat slower. I’ve provided two examples below: the Green Interactive Feeder and the Durapet Slow-feed Pet Bowl.

Hope this helps! - Parker

THE CHOICES YOU MAKE

My name is Parker. I’m a dog with an exceptional intellect so I use words to bark out enlightenment for humans. It’s not as fun as biting them, which they deserve sometimes, but I’m a friendly sort and prefer words to wounds. This brings me to Frat the cat. He is a reformed feral feline. – If there is such a thing.

Recently I admonished Frat for being rude to another dog and told him he should have better manners.  He retorted, “I’m a cat, I don’t have to be polite.” Frat has a tendency to say what other people think, which is often inappropriate but funny. As a result, I relish his richly worded opinions but can seldom share them with anyone. What Frat doesn’t understand, or care to consider is that it is hard to garner the loyalty of readers for my blog so the last thing I want to do is insult them. The way he views it, humans were cruel to him on the street (before he was rescued) so why not be cruel to them now that fear of retribution has been removed? He has a point.

Whereas I love humans, Frat finds more joy insulting them (figuratively speaking) or swatting humans upside the head (literally speaking). I’m not much of an artist but he sketched out a self-portrait that I included in this week’s blog (below). As you can see, he wears a chronic look of disdain on his fuzzy face that I swear is saying, “Since you are beneath me, it would be an indignity and a waste of my time to ingratiate myself to you.”  

I find immense joy in the company of humans and in teaching them. Sometimes I fear that by hanging out with Frat instead of my kinder, gentler animal pals, that I might become more like him. I like using a wagging tail to make humans smile, a friendly bark to lure them into a game of fetch, a soulful look to engage their heart, an exposed belly to snag a tummy rub. Humans become the best part of what they can be under the influence of a loving pet. They become more affectionate, compassionate and relaxed. When Frat enters the room, they coil.

This is the conundrum: Frat’s way with words make him an exceptional conversationalist for me. Very few animals (cat or canine) have my splendid vocabulary and I love a rich conversation. On the other hand, I can’t take Frat anywhere because he uses words as weapons.

So, who influences whom?

I’ve given the answer a great deal of thought and decided: it is a choice. It is a choice all of us make. When a perfectly nice college kid shuns her old friends because they don’t fit in with the type of girls in her preferred sorority house, it is a choice. When a young professional sabotages the career of a colleague because his ambitious coworkers tell him it is the fastest way to move to the top, it is a choice. When a nursing aide steals money from the wallet of a senior citizen that is in their care because his peers do it, it’s a choice.

I’m going to positively influence Frat’s behavior rather than let him jade mine. It’s a choice.

So my lesson of the week is this: humans are kidding themselves if they think it doesn’t matter what friends they hang out with but they are also kidding themselves when they use their friends’ [bad] behavior as an excuse for their own. Either choose your friends more wisely or choose to be the greater (and better) influence over your friends that lack the character to make right choices.  Hu-mans, choose wisely. Choices are often riddled with lifetime consequences.

LETTER FROM A FAN

Dear Parker: My human loves saving abandoned dogs and cats. Recently she participated in a fundraiser to help make money to save more of us. There was a pet contest (with a motorcycle theme) that I was sure to win due to my charming personality. (See my entry photo attached.)  Another dog won the contest however this isn’t what upset me. What burns my furry be-hind is that the event coordinator let a pig enter into the contest because it was the pet of one of the ticket holders. I find this insulting. What do you think?

Your friend and fan -  Dixie

Dixie Duffy

Dear Dixie:

You are a cutie but you’re thinking with your head and not your heart. Any animal saved, loved and nurtured (wild, feral or domesticated - pig, bird, dog or cat) deserves our support as do the humans that care for them. Don’t allow your prejudice for a pig cloud your passion for the creature cause. – That is such a human trait.       - Your Canine Advisor, Parker

"BERNARD" enters contest.

DemoCATS and RepubliMUTS

Hi, I’m Parker – an intellectual dog rescued by a foster mom (Jet) who writes this weekly blog to enlighten humans. Recently I noticed there is a lot of talk about Democrats and Republicans.  They are doing something to each other called voting; each works hard to convince everyone else that their side is better than the other and that their side is right and the other side is wrong.

I asked Jet about the meaning of these terms. She said it was easier if she explained it in a way that I could relate to as described to her by a friend, “View Democrats and Republicans as DemoCATS and RepubliMUTS.”

Simple: one term represents cats and the other represents dogs. My brilliant canine mind quickly envisioned a comparison chart.

DEMO-CATS	REPUBLI-MUTS
• 4 Legs • Meows • Assumes you will feed him or her • Wants to pontificate • Wants human companionship – from a   distance • Prefers scratching a post • Thinks cat-nip is nirvana	• 4 Legs • Barks • Anticipates you will feed him or her • Wants to play • Wants human companionship – close by • Prefers scratching an itch • Thinks a tummy rub is nirvana

I shared my chart with Jet and she confirmed I was pretty much on track. I retorted, “So, we’re different but we’re not enemies,” She smiled and said, “Yep, that just about sums it up.”  It made me wonder why so many human Democrats and Republicans refer to the other in such a derisive (big word of the week) manner; why so many treat each other with so much hostility and so little respect.

So my lesson of the week: Democrats (cats) or Republicans (dogs) don’t need to be at odds just because they appear odd to each other. In the end, they are both God’s creatures and they both love America. This week, go vote to express your political differences; once done, go hug someone from the other party to express your similarities - like your shared love of this great country. And remember that no matter how you vote, love is more important than a label so vote differently but live cooperatively.

LETTER FROM A FAN

Dear Parker: Thanksgiving is just around the corner and all my humans gather at our big house with a warm fire and serve up an insane quantity of different foods. All I get is the same old meal. This doesn’t seem fair. 

-  Dodger from Denver

Dear Disgruntled in Denver:

"Sahara" - Rescued by Society of Companion Animals

My foster mom (through the One Night Stand program operated by Society of Companion Animals) just rescued the nicest dog you’ve ever met. Named Sahara (see photo), this sweetie was sitting on the cold, concrete floor of a kill shelter waiting to be euthanized. Now that is not fair! Due to the giving of volunteers, Sahara is now living in the The Hamptons where she is being prepared for adoption by a loving forever family.

So Dodger, stop sounding like a selfish human and remember what this holiday is all about:  ‘thanking’ and ‘giving’ not receiving and complaining. Share your Thanksgiving bone with a homeless dog. The gesture will ‘taste’ better than any meal a human can serve you on November 22nd.